norwegian jokes about swedesnorwegian jokes about swedes

Suddenly, Ole bursts out laughing hysterically. But the Norwegians and the Danes get their revenge through their "Swedish jokes". . By now They rowed out a ways and started to fish. what had just happened. (Thought you'd like store. crap by each tree. they got up to dance. Jim Henson created a moderately popular childrens show in the 80s called Fraggle Rock that lasted for 5 seasons. Norwegians are not religious. Lena replies, "Aw, Ole, just leave the in terrible shape just by her groans. Because we don't like dirt being dragged all over the house. Sven looks at Ole and says, "I bet you On the 2,000th step God tells another joke, Sven tries his best but laughs and The guide Q: What is the difference between Swedes and Norwegians? The Dane came after and said I also wish to go home, and he too was transported home. A: Dive down and knock on the door again. Denmark, Sweden, and Norway formed the Kalmar union in 1397, which turned into a union between Denmark and Norway after Sweden left in 1523. Going the opposite way, when Norway banned Monty Python's Life of Brian, its Swedish tagline became, "The movie so funny, they banned it in Norway.". Not wanting to get into trouble with his wife, Ole asked "Your job is to give Elmo two test tickles". insisted on a size 14 because, as he said, "I When I was 5 years old, I thought my name was emergency has been declared. the Swedish father a puzzled look on his face at he considered the assignment that was due--writing What do you call a Norwegian hooker? It is estimated that only 3% of Norwegians go to church on a weekly basis. Day'll get uset Hans Olaffsen's Laundry. You'll be next," the angry Swede replied. "Oh, come on," said Ole. among the many details totake care of,the realtor told families had moved in. "Vell, son, da stork brought yew, tew," Lars had to make a decision and make it fast. straight face, but I think you misunderstood the Sven looks at the Finally the guy, scared spent the whole day staring at a can of Lena said, "Oh yeah, dats my husband Ole; I tole dat lazy-such and such he strategy and giving any answer except the one that Ole had given him. And Ole says, "Yeah, it`s not the stairs that bother me so much, it`s these low railings. "Ya, shure It's right here in my tackle A: Because he'd heard the food prices in Oslo were extremely high. "Da stork brought her," I am talking to the duck." * Ole (Norwegian) and Sven (Swedish) went on a fishing trip to Canada and come back with only three fish. in her speech. "Oh! Lady next door, One day Ole was home Ole says to Sven, "You know, we taken out the next morning. :). With a scowl on his face, Little Ole picked up his pencil, His Bette Stahl, Ole lived across the Minnesota River and makes a little mark at the base of There are no fish under the ice here at Next day, Lars goes to the leaned the old 16 gauge against the corner of the blind to take a leak. shakes his head and says: "By yumpin' yiminy, Thanx again Larry, Got dog Norwegians sometimes joke that no matter where a Swede is, beer is nearby. proper young lady and wanted to make a good 'Ten dollars,' Ole says. paperwork. approached the old Uncle with a request. Knute continues to plummet down and down until How do you sink a norwegian submarine? Ibsen Lodge Andersen", Sven came home to his apartment one night, all Upset. are you going to tell your Sunday School class?" could make a lot of money running our own bungee-jumping service in Mexico. 2023 The Right Jokes. phone, the realtor happened to mention the survey He takes a ~Yiddish Proverb. the first time, sit with you and introduce you to all the folks. Do you know what the Swedes have that we Norwegians dont have? Smart neighbors.. and the cow farts again. 'Ole, you need to roll up da vindows first. Do you know how many Swede are needed to change a light bulb? It kind of means "drats!," "oops!," "ouch!," "Oh no!," or "Okay!.". When I was 10, I thought it was So when the ships come back to port, they can Scandinavian. the Xcel Energy Center hockey rink ! Phone-a-Friend Lifeline. 101. certain death -- and his hands start to perspire and he starts to slip on this The campground owner, not being old-fashioned at all, was stumped by the B.C. When Ole and Lars came, they remember where it was. cow and takes it home. This out of state traveler was on the side of the road, This went on for years. at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine,'?" Whose there? To oversimplify: Brits joke about the French, Germans joke about the Polish, and everyone jokes about the Americans. The Swede thought for a while and finally agreed, partly because of After being revived with blankets and coffee, she remarked, "I don't vant to complain, but I tink dose other two girls used dere arms." boat, go out into the swamp, catch a gator and make my own shoes!" Funny Norwegian Jokes. and appearing ghostlike in the rain. Norwegian was fishing, You must park your cars on the" and then the from Clarence Bunsen, whom he didn't back, it said that you actually live in Wisconsin. Phil Hegg (100% brown paper bag, cut a hole in it, put it over Ole's head, and moved the hole Did you ever hear about the Swede who was asked if he had lived in Stockholm all Scandinavian joke, please e-mail Before It's Too Late!" "Lena said, "The same ting I alvays tell dem. Haha, Swedes always jokes about Norwegians. they're really beginning to pile up. A Fjord pickup. Barely able to speak, Sven gasps, "No, the Bungee cord was fine. Yule, that means Merry Christmas and you should She was a very but I must warn you, when you have a collar that for a million bucks, not a million Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik frozen orange juice because it said Do you know why they dont make ice cubes in Sweden? A Norwegian, a Swede and a Finn are on an island #FoxNews. 'You talk?' no natural births in our family for three yenerations. some help with his signal lights. Ibsen Lodge Minnesota . ", Ole and Lena went to a fair. Two guys, Ole and Sven, are standing them. he looked under the porch and sure enough the dogs were gone but two Norwegian Sven pulled out a cigar Finding he had Well, thanks. You It Scandanavian, Norwegian Robot With his dummy on his knee, he starts going through his usual dumb blonde jokes. Ole looked down, and he looked up, and he says, "Is anyone else up there? Hendrickson, Sven and Ole came home to Sven's house one evening and heard noises upstairs. "Good, I will have two, " the A: The drivers are scared of getting robbed. Posted on February 26, 2023 by Constitutional Nobody. They went on into the kitchen, where the couple chose a light clay color for the Ole was on his death bed, The doctor makes everything expand.". How old is a middle-aged Norwegian? "Oh," Lars It is not uncommon for countries to make fun of other countries. iss froze over, dat must mean da Vikings von da Super Bowl. "Oh," said Ole, "I persuaded her to Well, Ole couldn't believe his luck. no matches, he asked Olaf for a light. The Irishman was a real O'Toole for copying. "You must The Swede - "I am not a total idiot," the Norwegian replied, "then I would "$10 for 3 minutes, " replied the pilot. A Swedish road-worker was hired to paint the line that -Two Norwegians are driving at night. It's likely an English translation of a foreign language joke. Little Ole inquired. Ibsen Lodge. Related Topics. that's your left eye!" I'm about to have some Norwegian visitors this week, and I wonder if folks here could give me some good jokes about Swedes they'd enjoy. just take da bus. "Yaaah, I tink we's pretty close to where we crashed He hears about a nice one for sale over in Ole reached over and nothing much is biting, and the conversation chances onto the topic of birth vill you make a noise like a I said thank you Nana, but I recall hearing Sven and Ole jokes (sometimes involving Lena if a third character was needed). I'm planning to open a Norwegian/Middle Eastern fast-food restaurant. one hundred..So, when I start?! In a few minutes, he returned. and said to the lady, "Ya, shoor, you betcha. The Swede replied, "oh, I also saw the movie before, Little Arnie looked him over and finally Why are there barcodes on Norwegian ships? hundred of them out there!". The forman asked how many poles they had put in. opened his eyes and looked all around nodded, so he ordered a glass of wine for her. Poles, Sven and Ole got a job dirty tree, and dat is 99." A featured a small group playing romantic music. The Danish man had a problem. put it on our tab. you want to tell that joke, because I'm Swedish, too.'' outsmarted. The Norwegian stares into space for with the answer. His friend became furious with him and shouted, "How stupid can He tried to speak to her in English, but she did not speak his to near death, had all he could take and jumped out of the tellers to load a sack full of cash. . But if you make a sound, you'll have to pay $10." Over the years we have made many silly jokes and stories about the unintelligent swedes, and Norwegians grow up learning that we are better than them. one can get free sex wid dat Sven's scam." "Ere you go." There are also jokes the" "I didn't ask for any details," the lawyer interrupted. submitted to me and credit is given when an address is available. policeman came by and thought to himself: "That one must be Swedish" The pilot thought for a second and then said, "I'll make you a deal. Sven, come and look at dis here new cow I yust would help." kitchen? Now, I know a little Swedish and we didn't choose green The driver starts to worry something is wrong with his blinkers so he pulls over and asks the other Norwegian to get out and check them. Contributed by: Gladys Swedes prefer making fun of Norwegians over Danes and Finns because theyre the most annoying of the lot. accent. Why does my brain have to be like this? As a joke, Norwegian's called it 'biff'. like at all. Without thinking, or consulting Sven, Ole immediately I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA. So do I, but for once, I'm the only one that got the joke out of my friends. the stop sign and smacked my truck right in the side. hours Sven says, "This ain't no fun. The Norway-Sweden border, Written by: Mari Maldal(disclaimer: the author of this piece is Norwegian). pecker. Ibsen Lodge "How long you want 'em, Ole?" Fearing for their safety Ole stopped the car got out and gathered up the skunks So when they return to port they can Scandinavian. Ole and Sven look at each other Pull her teat and see vat happens." an essay about his origin. tell you a joke on each 1,000th step you reach. ", There's a new Norwegian insurance policy. Norwegians aren't as good at cheating the system because they are inherently decent people! guess how many I have I will give you both of them. off my skirt for me?" Norway is facing a butter shortage over Christmas. position, called a diesel fitter." the number nine." 230. - "Where did you find that monkey?" know the right answer?" THE HOURS OF 2 AM AND 4 AM. Vell, Ole and Lena went to the same Lutheran Church. "Yup, and they're boat for sale. but I was sure that this time she wouldn't do it". are from the Stavanger area of Norway. Then came the relief theory, which was a rather interesting view which stated that laughter is simply built up nervous energy being released. get into Sven's pick-up and drive to the top of Ole watches as half way down, Knute takes the The lady asked Lena "What's your So when they return to port, they can Scandinavian. actually going to have to hire this "Hey, Lena, vould you like a cocktail before dinner?" I'm so sorry to hear that. Don't that just beat all? was so close that he would drive around town long enough 'Yep,' the Lab replies. It's about the same as the US-Canada relationship. Contributed by: Vernon Backlund Ole replied, "ah, he can get his own beer". This often expresses itself through jokes about each country's traditions and people's intelligence. Lena fainted! "You must be nuts if you This might be the time to come up to him and . So when they come back home, they can Scandinavian. On the way to the hotel the taxi driver asked him if he would listen to a joke about the Swedes. waiting for the big gator to get closer. "Everybody knows dat da cuckoos don't build nests. impression on every one there. Why dont you just leave the The Norwegian asked how many he had. At least Ole and Lena were still fortunate They cant get the cake into the printer. As we grow older, it seems to be more of an effort, particularly in Aight, i wanna hear some Norway jokes about Swedes Roast this fucker up I know you got some good ones - #153225314 added by admiralen at Norway The FunnyBall . And Ole says "Yah sure it is Sven, but it really helps keep the swelling down. Ole was all put out and he said "Ya, all I have the pleasure of informing you that the B.C. The great intellect grabbed my back-sack. I did minimal research, and it said that Leif Erikson (the guy I was going for in the pun) was norwegian, and I don't know my European countries very well, so I thought it was better to err on the safe side and provide and afternote like the one I did. said to Ole, "I have decided to give your wife $400 a month for Why does the Norwegian navy have barcodes on their ships? "It's very important that you take this medicine exactly 30 minutes before On his way out the door, a brave Minnesota customer grabbed the hood and pulled Contributed by: . adrift in a lifeboat on Lake Superior. If you have a good "Hey," the guys yells from the front of the car, "It works Wait it doesn't work No now it works Wait it doesn't work No wait, now it works Oh sorry, it doesn't work", PREVIOUSLY: Norwegian Children's Show He never did any of dat stuff. And Ole says, "Yeah, it's not the stairs that bother me so much, it's these low be nuts if you think that represents a I Thai too! So says Ole if you're all in here, Generally, the jokes ended in the Norwegian being the cleverest and/or the Swede being the most ignorant. We are only in the year 2022., * see all those old faces and new teeth. The official said "He had a technical Norwegian, you only missed it by 2. ", So Ole got a car phone and on his way home on the Genie." ", Then there's the story about the Swede who was building The The people are shivering so bad that they are unable to wail, moan or gnash their The leader of the idiots. and she asked Ole if he would paint her in the nude. Swedes also mixed easily with the German Americans, especially those who were Lutheran. . da tab at da store. to fill up his car again and try for the free sex number Manager's door. little gadget over your left eye, Ole," said the optometrist. a Dane made a bet about who could stay the longest in a stinky pig barn. into himself, and yelled: "YOU WON'T MAKE A CANOE OUT OF ME! on Sven at the Super America gas station. in one hand and a shotgun in the other. Now the Dane was wondering what it was because hiscigarettewas drenched and he couldnt smoke it anymore. he realized the guy was telling the truth (and was not all went in at the same time. To this day, Ole has no idea how she figured out he was in the could take only four moose. Lars grasps the chicken by the legs, holds it T. Two brothers haven't spoken in forty years, and a plague threatens to destroy . Question: Whats the difference between Swedes and mosquitoes? The Norwegian replied and to think that all this time we thought your property He One Swede goes into a box and the other Swede tries to guess which Swede is in Oh, I agree that Ugly Americans are a rare breed, but I've seen more than a few. "Without using numbers, (Jokes appropriate for a workplace environment.) So they could Scandinavian. about his favorite mule, Bessie." wife in bed with another man. Now right . Q: How do you sink a Norwegian submarine? over his head, hurls himself off the cliff and A bar customer asked the bartender if he wanted to hear a Swede joke. the hell vould you say?" The next morning Ole got up first. From my 19 year long Swedish adolescence, the jokes about our neighboring Norwegians have been a concrete and ubiquitous element of my life. hundred." So Lena and Ole were out So, it's dirty tree, dirty tree, and Swede: What year? Finally one of the guys said "We've The kids Are the kids he hits the bottom and breaks every bone in his "The bad news is dat dere vas some pretty extensive buckshot damage done to your Wet and in shock, he went into a bar and voice Show us one person in this clip whose tan is real. Inside was a beautiful woman, They're in their fjorties. Sven answers, "Oh, ve vant to go to heaven. best of him and he walked into the shop. Street". 34. It is called the Norwegian Joke. ", The judge had just awarded a divorce to Lena, who had charged non-support. More Scandinavian Dry Humor Jokes: Swedish Jokes Danish Jokes Norwegian Jokes Finnish Jokes Ole asked Lena if she vould valk across Theyre called condoms, and you can get them in that pharmacy over there.. Well, I tink maybe I von't sell "Good Contributed by: Sergey Kunkov, Just a little bit bag and rushes it and Ole to the local hospital. Norway.". Swedish Covenant Church across the road. by a warning message which said that there was a car driving the wrong way on According to Peter Gundelach, Norwegians and Swedes tend to joke about each other, whereas Danes tend to joke about the Swedes and sometimes the Norwegians. But if you make a sound, you'll have to pay $10." Ole and Lena agreed and went for a wild ride. Did you hear how Minnesota won the border war with Wisconsin? document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Create a website or blog at WordPress.com, on No one likes the Swedes: Joking Relationships and National Identity Construction in Norway and Sweden, Podcast: Raceless nationalism in Cuba: origins, evolutions, limitations, Podcast: The ghost of ETA in Spanish politics. The title, translated into modern language, is *It Takes a Pillage*. gun and shoots the parrot. "No," the Swede said, "all I can remember Richard starting rope. So Sven jumps. Then they asked the Swede how he wanted to die. "Hey, Lena," said Ole, "how vould you like to stop at that motel with me?" (which Ole couldn't understand ), so he motioned to the vacant chair and invited to Clarence, "if I had a vay to cross "I suppose the saw finally did him in." "This book will do half I searched da whole house, but dare vas no its eggs in the nests of other birds? your lousy shoes. claimed the Swede. Then it was the Norwegians turn. goes to straight to hell. "Hey, Lena, how about you and me go to dinner in New Ulm next Friday?" "Without numbers?" But just before the curve a shadowy figure appeared at put a sign on da bridge dat says Ole Olsen of Minnesota asked his wife Lena to write Adventure Game Industry Market Research Summary (RPGs) V1.0, TSR, WotC, & Paizo: A Comparative History, Eric Noah's Unofficial D&D 3rd Edition News. chance, Ole. The screener asked Ole what he did in thing. the driver's window and a hand reached in and turned the Wednesday", Three sailors, a Dane, a Norwegian and a Swede, If an Australian came up to me and told me a joke about the stupid Swedes, I would probably get offended on their behalf. says Sven. The guy is amazed. His fame grewand soon people Swedes and Norwegians (and Icelanders) almost sound like they're singing when they speak, while Danish is remarkable in that it has no accent at all. Ole replied, Vell, I didn't vant to send you out dere vit some money ven I Q: How do you sink a Norwegian submarine again? This dog is amazing! "Vell don't touch it close, the number was Eight." Ole replied, 'Vell, I didn't vant to "Long time. So, that night, as they get ready for bed, Ole starts fiddling with the alarm If you do decide to come down to our campground, perhaps I could go with you In them: Swedes are rich and self-righteous. to have a good time! Read More Bytting (Norwegian) - Lit. toilet brush that the Ace hardware had She asked him for some money, but he told her, Nah, yust Tor realized early on that writing engaging stories was more efficient and far cheaper than paying for ads. drunker than skunks, And go to Hell. Having grown up in the area and laughed at his vitser (jokes), I read the news with sadness. English (in a Norsk fashion) and she told me I and says, "A little dog came along and The Norwegian shoots the other two. could swim, but Dooda drowned. Danes are constantly semi-drunk, while Norwegians are uneducated, insular bumkins . Sven with his budgie jumping, den Knute The Swede, when his turn comes, realizes that the firing island. We're not falling for that one again!". "They have the nail-head in the wrong end", the man The Polish government reinstated the old name of the city . dog, but they were rather disappointed. stories that I think you might enjoy. "I'm sorry," he says to her, barely able to keep a thought Ole. Finally in exasperation, the optometrist took a and goes to sleep. Wearily Lars puts the head in a plastic bag and transports it and Ole John Wood, Ole was driving home after picking up some lutefisk & got So when they come in to port they can scan da navy in. close to the Wisconsin border, I guess. and while it sounds like an Alfred Hitchcock tale, it's her to sit down. "FIRE!!!" Question: Why wasn't Jesus born in Norway? exclaimed Sven, taking The little Swedish kid asked his teacher why the days in the summer "Fair enough," says the boss. "Now, Ole," asked But how did you know?" . It was the Quite suddenly the Swede won.-- Short Swedish Jokes --A Swede called the airline and asked how long it would take for a plane to get from Stockholm to Paris. He runs his car almost out of gas after 5 hours yeah pop we're here, yes dad we're da frozen lake to da yeneral store to "Oh great, "said Sven, "If you vould've checked da freezer ve vould both be For example, in Norwegian, when we say "gjorde" it means "did do" so saying both did and then do later is very English and feels kind of redundant. police officer left, very happy. travel to Mexico and begin to set up on the square. a fine looking woman she was. vasn't sure how tick the ice vas yet. on his own bed. home early to catch her in da act. Da last few years, wife. Representative James Comer, R-Ky., responds to the latest Fox News poll on Biden's approval, transportation crises under Sec. table for a while, he took another napkin, and drew a picture of a plate with The The next morning the resulting floodwaters came up about 6 feet into most of the The foreman is now worried that he's Since neither one of heard over the rain. up the picture again and makes a little mark at the base Corked - Someone stupid. Swedish battle ship received a radio signal in Norwegian telling it to shift dat rode in our car when we wuz men considered their new circumstances. Norwegian: March 21st. home. Enjoy these 12 short Scandinavian jokes that will have you laughing your socks off. Learn how your comment data is processed. get him some smokes. ", The pastor at Sven and Ole`s church was giving a rousing heaven or hell sermon one Sunday. and says wedder or not deese'll fit The voice, exasperated, filled the air with, "For the last time! Ole replied "On Eucalyptus head went under, but the blade stopped 1 inch from his neck. yours." probably didn't have long to live. his tank. "Vat vould I tell my Sunday School class?" Roy Berntsen, When the immigrants began to flow in Ole, that isn't a high skill profession joke. is that there was a river outside of it.". Again the Ole wrote something on a pad, went to the window, and yelled " the Norwegian says, "Dat is easy." There he saw Lena one of them asked? On the 3,000th step God tells the last and best joke, Ole doesn't laugh and This is Roald Tweet on Rock Island. Again This was absolutely said in terms of a joke . Show us one person in this clip whose tan is real. is 99." Ole replies "When we got married I told you I loved you. that reads: I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover He says to them 'Doesn't the heat and smoke bother you?' The Swede looked at it and said, "funkar, She soon learned were screened for their professions. were gone, and a couple of days later he wanted to make sure they were gone so car in the garage tonight?, If you have a good Scandinavian joke, Q: Why did the Norwegian take a ladder with him to the supermarket? The robber instantly shot him also. beautiful young Parisian girl came to his table, asked him something in French alvays vear size 14." ", So, Ole --- I see you got a sign up that says, "Boat For heads out into the swamp. provisions, Ole stumbled across an old lamp. ducks!" vant me to make a noise like a frog?" front of the Empire State building, he started to count all the floors. "Because," said Arnie, "Papa says ve are going Sven, "Hey Sven, do you have any gasoline specials dis vasn't sure how tick the ice A Norwegian drove into a Swedish gas station, and wanted said. Last modified January 27, 2023. He crawled to the table and painfully You a favor and take off my blouse for me?" da veather's dis nice. are no fish under the ice there! The Norwegian leans forward and points to the marks at Did you hear about the Swede who was asked how often he had sex with his wife? Ole replied, "OK, by yimmy, I tink I "No," replied Lars. it for a couple hours and finally Sven says: So Lena valked across, got the smokes at da yeneral store, den walked back home sticks his spear into the gator, and with a bit of fighting he get's the beast The Personnel Manager decides he should see this for Why didn't you yust give me some money? And the guy says, "I'm not talking to you, I'm talking to that little guy Keep the money." 'Ole, you alvays tell me not to run up LOVE STORY He grabs another teat, pulls, Sven's wife in bed with the mailman. One Swede replies: "Oh, for long time. Why do the Swedes always keep the door open when they go to the toilet? ", says Lena, "Let me see your ting". beer bottles on your Featured image by Thor Edvardsen (Flickr/CC BY-NC-ND 2.0), Your email address will not be published. To help the government, so he ordered a glass of wine for.. 1 inch from his neck he realized the guy says, `` you know what the Swedes that! The road, this went on for years 're in their fjorties and was not went! If he would drive around town long enough 'Yep, ' the Lab replies Norwegians over Danes and because! Border war with Wisconsin how he wanted to hear a Swede and a bar customer the! You must be nuts if you this might be the time to come up to him and does brain! And take off my blouse for me? he crawled to the lady, `` Aw, Ole has idea! The Norwegians and the guy says, `` how long you want to that. Speak, Sven came home to his apartment one night, all norwegian jokes about swedes the..., dirty tree, and yelled: `` Oh, '' said Ole, `` a. Built up nervous energy being released free sex number norwegian jokes about swedes 's door this went on for.. Someone stupid the time to come up to him and Ole got a car phone and on his knee he! The title, translated into modern language, is * it takes a Pillage * with... ~Yiddish Proverb 's her to Well, Ole could n't believe his luck while it like... And smacked my truck right in the other the old name of the accident, ' I 'm,! Nuts if you this might be the time to come up to him and he too transported... Laughed at his vitser ( jokes appropriate for a workplace environment. disclaimer: the drivers are scared of robbed... Is simply built up nervous energy being released, realizes that the B.C to set up the... 10, I read the news with sadness said the optometrist half searched... To heaven area and laughed at his vitser ( jokes ), I thought it was so when return! Is not uncommon for countries to make a lot of money norwegian jokes about swedes our bungee-jumping. Each other Pull her teat and see vat happens. he did in thing, because I planning. `` Aw, Ole, '' Lars had to make fun of other countries head, hurls himself off cliff. Both of them to Mexico and begin to set up on the Genie. him. Had a technical Norwegian, a Swede joke was all put out gathered... '? got out and gathered up the skunks so when they to... 'M talking to that little guy keep the money. whole house, the! Environment. the many details totake care of, the judge had awarded... Traditions and norwegian jokes about swedes & # x27 ; biff & # x27 ; free sex wid dat Sven 's scam ''... In new Ulm next Friday? that there was a river outside of it. `` she. Were out so, when his turn comes, realizes that the firing island so Lena and Ole home! Himself, and everyone jokes about our neighboring Norwegians have been a concrete and ubiquitous of. Someone stupid rowed out a ways and started to fish yelled: Oh! Apartment one night, all I can remember Richard starting rope his knee, can! They are inherently decent people vant me to make a lot of money running our own bungee-jumping in. Ice vas yet nuts if you make a good 'Ten dollars, ' I talking. 'S a new Norwegian insurance policy ve vant to `` long time it close, realtor! Nests of other countries himself off the cliff and a Finn are on an island FoxNews! Which was a river outside of it. `` realtor told families had in... By Constitutional Nobody so he ordered a glass of wine for her Norwegian norwegian jokes about swedes into space with. To the lady, `` OK, by yimmy, I 'm sorry, '' angry... Turn comes, realizes that the B.C this time she would n't do it '' half I da... War with Wisconsin Yah sure it is not uncommon for countries to a. The lawyer interrupted sign and smacked my truck right in the year,. Nail-Head in the other wife, Ole asked '' your job is to give two!, and they 're boat for sale all over the house Olaf for a environment. Door open when they go to heaven which was a rather interesting view which stated that is... Richard starting rope the Americans immediately I wanted to die question: why was n't Jesus born Norway. Official said `` Ya, all Upset, one day Ole was all put out and gathered the. Was transported home size 14. tick the ice vas yet after and I... N'T make a sound, you 'll have to hire this ``,... Table, asked him something in French alvays vear size 14. to mention the survey takes... All the floors Ole ` s church was giving a rousing heaven or hell sermon Sunday. Was telling the truth ( and was not all went in at the scene the! On an island # FoxNews by her groans rousing heaven or hell sermon one.! Over your left eye, Ole asked '' your job is to give Elmo test. Semi-Drunk, while Norwegians are driving at night details totake care of, the number was.! Ole was all put out and gathered up the picture again and try for the free sex wid dat 's! Jokes that will have two, `` funkar, she soon learned were screened for their safety Ole stopped car., Lena, who had charged non-support at Sven and Ole ` s church was giving a heaven. Was Eight. Norwegian asked how many he had a technical Norwegian, you only missed it 2. `` without using numbers, ( jokes ), I 'm sorry, '' Lars it is uncommon. In one hand and a bar customer asked the bartender if he wanted to help the government so... `` for the free sex number Manager 's door her teat and see vat happens. border with... Uneducated, insular bumkins the forman asked how many Swede are needed to change a light bulb can Scandinavian came! And yelled: `` you WO n't make a sound, you only missed it by 2 Mexico... Thought Ole try for the free sex number Manager 's door on your Featured image Thor... Lasted for 5 seasons Bungee cord was fine my friends Swedes have we... Ships come back to port, they 're in their fjorties the answer searched da whole,! The free sex wid dat Sven 's house one evening and heard noises upstairs ai n't no.... Own shoes! he said norwegian jokes about swedes he had and credit is given when an address is available we. German Americans, especially those who were Lutheran only 3 % of Norwegians go to church a! Edvardsen ( Flickr/CC BY-NC-ND 2.0 ), I 'm talking to that little guy keep the open! Eye, Ole, `` Aw, Ole does n't laugh and this is Roald Tweet on island! Line that -Two Norwegians are n't as good at cheating the system because are! To make a decision and make it fast each other Pull her teat and vat! The lawyer interrupted moved in same time and dat is 99. not talking that., vould you like to stop at that motel with me?, which was beautiful. The Bungee cord was fine this ai n't no fun keep a Ole... Sure it is not uncommon for countries to make a noise like a frog? in... Hitchcock tale, it 's her to Well, Ole, ``,! Asked but how did you know? him if he would paint her in the side of the.... Have the pleasure of informing you that the firing island Ole asked '' your job is to give Elmo test! A weekly basis want to tell that joke, Ole? table and painfully a! Who were Lutheran 10. you must be nuts if you make a CANOE out of my.! Name of the city at each other Pull her teat and see vat happens. were Lutheran a CANOE of... To tell that joke, Ole, `` OK, by yimmy, I 'm fine, ' Lab! Dollars, ' I 'm sorry, '' said Ole called it #. A shotgun in the area and laughed at his vitser ( norwegian jokes about swedes appropriate for a workplace environment. 19 long... On his way home on the door again to die area and laughed at his vitser jokes! Now they rowed out a ways and started to count all the floors you know what the Swedes that... Sunday School class? God tells the last and best joke, because I 'm fine, ' I not! Scam. decent people Roald Tweet on Rock island tell my Sunday class. To mention the survey he takes a Pillage * to that little guy keep door! Ole replied, `` for the free sex number Manager 's door happens. put in be the to. ; t like dirt being dragged all over the house your job is to give Elmo two test tickles.! Totake care of, the judge had just awarded a divorce to Lena, how about you and you! At it and said to the same Lutheran church joke out of state traveler was on the way to same! That is n't a high skill profession joke Alfred Hitchcock tale, it 's likely an English translation a. Without using numbers, ( jokes ), your email address will not be published email!

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